Midas Journal 16

 First / Previous / Next / Latest

---

Entry: May 1

Yesterday night, after suppertime, Lue called me. She opened with, “Kael! Uuh, we have a problem. Or, I have a problem but you're involved. Or..”

“What is it?” I said.

“Weeelll, you know how I introduced you—or Kayla—to someone, uh, about a week ago?”

“Yes. Brian. We had a talk about that.”

“And! In light of that talk I'm willing to call this situation my problem. But as a friend I'd like to ask for your help even though it totally isn't your problem, and it's definitely, completely not your fault.”

“What. Is the problem.”

“Uh. So uh. The problem is, Brian's been getting kinda, well, he asked me if I had seen you since last Friday. Seen Kayla, I mean. I may remind you that I have a lot more experience of the world than I look or sound like I do, and judging by his behavior I think he likes you. Likes Kayla, that is.”

I didn't say anything for a few seconds, and she added. “Umm, yeah, I know, this is bad. In keeping with my promise of not playing matchmaker I haven't given him a straight answer, which I find harder to do than you'd believe.”

“So, what do you want me to do about it?”

“Well, I generally believe the truth is the best option for an awkward situation. But if I told him that you're a recently-awakened reality warper who can change between being a boy and girl nearly at will, and are therefore not interested in any relationship at all right now he'll probably think I'm deflecting his questions by saying crazy things. I do that sometimes, it wouldn't be an unfair assumption.”
“So you want me to..”
“I could point you in the direction of his house, arrange it as a meeting between you two, and you could show him what the deal is so he'll believe it. Anyway, hearing you're not romantically interested in general from someone else's mouth is a lot less effective than hearing it from yours. Or—”

“Or from Kayla's, yes. You can stop doing that please.”

“Sorry. But you see what I mean? I know, I'm asking you to fix my mess and all. If you don't want to it's fine, I can just say Kayla moved or something? He might not buy it but a straight lie like that would send a message anyway.”
“No, it's..”

I sighed, I thought for a minute about how being around him as Kayla had made me feel. I thought about what Threa had suggested. I thought about how Lue was my friend, like it or not. It felt like about five minutes' worth of thinking but it must have been only a few seconds because it wasn't interrupted by the other end of the line. Finally I said, “It's fine. I'll talk to him. Soon as possible. When is that?”

“Hmm, I'll have to check with him but probably tomorrow. I'll text you the details after I get in touch with him. And, um, Kael.”

“Uh-huh?”

“Thanks. I don't know if you understand how bad lying and dodging around questions like I have been makes me feel. And I'm glad you trust me enough to not accuse me of playing matchmaker again.”

“Well, if you were, it would blow open as soon as I talked with Brian again anyway.”
“Heh, yeah, there's that.”

The next person to call me was Adena. She said, “Hey! Kael, guess what!”
“What?”
“Uugh, you're supposed to actually guess something when someone says that. Whatever, anyway, I figured out some more cool stuff I can do with my magic and I wanna show you! Like, tomorrow sometime?”
“I'm, uh, not sure when I won't be busy tomorrow. Long, annoying story.”
“That's fine, day after?”
“Yeah, sure.”
“Okay, so meet me at the ice cream place a little after lunchtime maybe?”
“Sure.” So I can bet I'll have to write another entry for whatever insanity happens tomorrow, too.

But anyway, the reason I'm writing this entry is what happened today. This afternoon I went over to the address Lue sent me as Kayla and rang the doorbell. After I waited outside for a minute or so Brian opened up. In the time between I had been careful to focus on what I was going to say in an effort to keep myself from getting nervous, but I did feel nervous once he showed up, thanks largely to the same sort of feelings as before. This meant it hadn't been a fluke, which was, well, bad, I thought.

“Hey,” he said, “uh, Lue said you wanted to talk to me about something?” Well that was good, he seemed nervous too. For possibly reasons that might make him more upset about what I had to say, which was bad. After however long it took me to ping-pong that through my head he said, “Err, I mean, not out here of course. Come on in.”

He led the way into his living room, which was thankfully empty, and offered me a seat on a couch before taking one across from it. “Soo, uh, what's up?”

I had been thinking about how to introduce the topic since deciding to meet with him about it, and I was still pretty sure a good way to do that didn't exist, and if it did I probably didn't have it, but I had decided on what to do anyway, no matter how bad an idea it turned out to be, because stalling an hour while there trying to come up with a better way was worse than anything else, I figured. “I, uh, need to show you something, and then I need to explain all about it. It'll really be easier if you don't interrupt me, okay?” I said.

“Okay, sure,” he said, nodding.

“Good.” I decided to poke my own shoulder with the opposite hand even though I was using the 'built-in' turn-into-Kael power because I figured it was very important he know that my power usually was involved touching from the get-go. Once I had turned completely back into myself (with Brian looking surprised and confused, but keeping my 'don't interrupt' rule very well), I took a deep breath, and then poked my other shoulder with the opposite hand and shifted back into Kayla, wearing slightly different clothes because I hadn't concentrated on that detail at all.

“I was born as the guy you saw me turn into,” I said first, “named Kael. The morning after my eighteenth birthday, about two months ago, I suddenly became able to change people by touching them. S-specifically, turn guys into girls? With some kind of strange wish-fulfillment angle to it that I'm still not sure I completely understand. At points after that I figured out how to use my power on myself, I unwillingly or accidentally changed five or six different people. Err, I met Lue that way too.” (She had given me permission to mention that, I'd asked her.) “The way my powers work is kind of ridiculous, it doesn't just change a person's body, it moves reality around so that most people think they've always been that way, and even people who know they weren't can remember both what it was like when they weren't and a 'new' version of things where they were.”

There were a few seconds of silence before I realized he wasn't sure whether or not talking at this point would be interrupting. “So, uh, there's a lot more details than that but if you ask me what you want to know I'll know which ones are actually important,” I said a little awkwardly.

“Lue and I have been friends for at least a couple of years,” he said, “are you saying some..most of that, is...fake?”
“Not really? I don't understand how my powers work, but your memory of things is probably more real now than a version where she wasn't around.”

“So, you're not usually, uh, you don't usually look how you do now.”
“I, um, usually like to stay as my original self, yeah. I turn into Kayla to...well, for a bunch of reasons, but it still feels weird and I have a hard time thinking of it as really me most of the time...”

He looked up at a corner of the ceiling for a few seconds. “Err..this is kind of awkward then. I, uh, I guess Lue told you as much, but I might sort of like you.”

“...I..hope you can understand how weird that is for me.”
“Sorta?”
“But,” I could feel some heat on my cheeks as I tried to spit this out, “since we first met I think I might, sort of like you too? I'm, just not sure what to do with that because I definitely don't want to stay as a girl for, I mean I don't know how to deal with the idea of dating a guy, and I don't know how to make sense of, uh..” I trailed off, not sure what I was even trying to say at this point.

“..And you said your power could change anyone? Like, you could turn me into a girl if you wanted to?”

“Well..I-I could, but I mean I don't want to do that to anyone who doesn't want me to, and I'm not totally sure my power doesn't mess around with people's minds, which I am really not okay with and trying to figure out how to be sure about...”
“But, what if...” He stopped, and looked like he was thinking.

“What if what?”
“Well, uh, my first idea was that maybe you could turn me into a girl and I could try dating you as a guy? I mean, you being the guy. If we still think we like each other after you did that. Y-you could turn me back if you wanted to too, right?”
“I..think so. My power has a weird bias, but at the least I think I've figured out how to give someone a power to shift back and forth like I just did without my help.”

“But then when you started talking about messing with people's minds..it sounds like you'd need someone to help you make sense of that, right? If you turned me into a girl and then put everything back the way it was maybe I could tell you if it seemed like you messed anything up with my head.”

I briefly wondered if he had somehow talked to Threa before I got there.

“Uh..are you sure you'd be okay with all that?”
“I mean, your powers sound pretty powerful, but they didn't make Lue your love-slave or anything, so I know they wouldn't do that to me, either. And what you could do is just make me turn back to normal whether I want to or not, you know, if I got messed up so that I didn't want to change back. Maybe after giving it a week? And if I agree to that now then you know I'm definitely okay with it.”

“I don't...get it, why do you want to do all of this stuff for me?”
“Well, I mean, it's not totally for you. I'm a little curious what it's like on the other side of the fence, and uh, this is gonna sound a little weird I think but..I don't think I've ever wanted to go on a date with someone so badly in my life.”

“Y-you want to go on a date with me?”
“Yes. I mean, probably. I definitely feel that way right now. And, w-we could sort out the details after I'm a girl and you're a guy, if I still feel that way. Right?”
“S-sure.”

He stood up. “Okay, so, I'm ready to try it if you are.”
“Y-yeah,” I said, also standing up and turning myself back into Kael first.

“Er, how does this work exactly?” he said as I walked over in front of him.

“For whatever reason, my power works by touching whoever I want to change...or, really more often it works when I accidentally touch someone I didn't really want to change, and keeps working whether I want it to or not.”
“That's what you meant by accidents, huh?”
“Yeah,” I said, now standing in front of him. I could 'feel' that he was definitely going to change if I touched him. “Are you ready?”

He nodded, and I reached out my hand and gently poked his forehead. I tried to tell my power to only do what he wanted it to do, and not anything else.

Brian closed his eyes for some reason. From the point where I'd touched him, his skin started to shift, getting a little paler and visibly smoother. The stubble on his face shrank away, and he shuddered slightly after the change in his skin spread down past his neck, probably because the rest of his skin was changing the same way. He was barefoot, and after a second or two I could see it spread down through his feet.

As soon as that was over, Brian started shrinking. He had been a little taller than me (Kael) and as soon as I noticed he was shrinking he was already right at my height. The shrinking was more than height, with his clothes looking baggier on him by the second, and he quickly reached down as his jeans slipped off of his legs to grab his boxers before they did the same. His face and hands and feet all looked smaller, and his shoulders were visibly narrower; his exposed legs looked slimmer and, as I'd guessed, their hair was all gone, too.

Next, Brian's hair started to grow out. Its color looked like it was fading, like a picture left out in the sun too long, and it grew relatively slowly (compared to how mine tends to grow, at least). He made a small “Mmh” sound in a voice higher than usual, and then muttered “I feel..warm..” in a voice still rising in pitch. Then his ears grew out into wolf ears again, except that their fur was now completely white (which his hair was fast approaching). And then a tail sprouted from his back. It was big, bushy, and white like his ears, and I noticed it was swishing back and forth slowly.

He finally stopped getting shorter when the top of his head was at the bottom of my neck, and his hair stopped growing just short of his shoulders, now completely bleach-white like the fur on his ears. Next, his clothes started to change: The pants on the floor turned into a small pair of denim shorts, his shirt turned white and grew longer sleeves but otherwise shrank close to his body, and then started to split apart at the center, growing buttons and button holes but only leaving one button attached by the time it was done. He didn't have any curves yet, and just looked like a scrawny guy, but his underwear quickly shrank into a tiny pair of black panties anyway, and I made a point of not looking there even though his eyes were still closed.

With his shirt split apart like it was, I could see that despite being small and scrawny-looking Brian still had a six-pack...and then, about as soon as I'd noticed that, he didn't. His stomach seemed to turn softer and smoother, and then, with his shirt clinging close the whole time, his waist shrank inward and his hips pushed out and back. “A-aah, w-wow,” he said, his voice already sounding like a young boy trying to imitate an older guy. His cheeks were turning more and more red as his body shape changed, and then his mouth opened again with a surprised “Aaah!” in a high-pitched girl-voice. I risked a look downward and saw that the panties had pulled completely flat between Brian's legs: He had just become her.

Then, with another, shorter “Aah!” in the same voice her chest pushed out into breasts. They were small at first, but kept growing, cheered on by a small “Mmmm” from deep in her throat. I started to remember that her name was Brie, and all of a sudden I started feeling nervous. As her breasts filled out into what must be a C cup at least, I started getting the same kind of racing-heart jitters I had had when I first met Brian, as Kayla.

When the changes stopped completely, Bria opened her eyes one at a time, and I saw that they were now red. “Wow,” she said, “you didn't warn me it would feel this good.”

“Uh, e-everyone says it feels good but it never does for me, it just feels kinda weird and awkward,” I said, not sure why I was even talking at all.

She looked up at me for a few seconds, her tail still wagging and traces of the blush still on her cheeks. “Uh..what?”
Without any warning, Brie pounced up at me and threw her arms around my shoulders, and planted her lips directly on top of mine. I was too surprised to react for a second or two, and once my brain started to come back from its blue screen of death my first instinct was to put my arms around her and return the kiss for a few more seconds before finally coming slightly more to my senses and pulling my head away. I couldn't make myself let go of her, though.

“Arf!” (she actually made kind of a high-pitched bark) “Well, I definitely still wanna go on a date with you,” she said, grinning. Then she blushed slightly and said a little more nervously, “Th-that was my first kiss, by the way..”

“Um..” I knew I was blushing, too. It had just hit me all at once: She was so cute, and hot, and beautiful all at once. The feeling of her breasts up against my chest, and her arms around me, and her face so close to mine, was unlike anything I'd ever felt before, as a guy or a girl. “I-I uh, second for me. B-but my first one was kind of stolen, and short, and not—uh, I mean, that was..on a whole different level.”

“I'd never know,” said Brie, “You're a really good kisser, Kael.”

I thought about bringing up the subject of maybe putting her down for a good several quiet seconds and then said, “U-uh,” which she responded to by pulling her face up to mine and taking another kiss, slightly longer than the first one. Then, as if she'd sensed my thoughts, she let go of me and easily hopped back down to her feet, leaving me dazed for several more seconds.

“Um..are your, uh, parents around? You're a little indecent, I mean, uh, it's a good look for you but this may be hard to explain,” I said.

“Oh, they're out for another hour or so, Kael,” she said, grinning mischievously. “But I know, with all the stuff you're dealing with we should take it slow..” she stepped back a bit.

“Um..any idea why your ears and tail grew out like that?” I asked, a little desperate for something to talk about.

“Oh, uh, for some reason I have a lot more moonlight.” She must have seen that I didn't understand that, because she added, “Werewolves use moonlight as power to change forms, you know, and we change completely on the full moon whether we want to or not because we always absorb too much moonlight and have to burn it off. Some people—like me now, I guess—have bodies really good at absorbing the stuff, and have to keep some wolfy looks all the time to keep from randomly going full werewolf at inconvenient times. Why, do you not like it?”

“Oh, no, I uh..well I've never been in a position to think about it this way before but I think I like them. They're, kinda cute,” I said, my cheeks getting hotter again.

“Heehee. So, uh, how's Monday night?”

“How's—oh, the date. Yeah. Monday's, Monday night is fine. Like, for supper?”

“Mhm,” she said, nodding. “You can pick the place, as long as it has meat. And not stupid expensive fancy junk, either.”
“N-no, I don't think I could afford that anyway.”
“Casual dress.”
“Sure.”

So now I guess I'm going on a date Monday night, too. The first date I've been on with anyone. I don't feel all that nervous about it, honestly, but that probably just means that whatever controls panic in my brain is way too far behind to have even noticed it yet.

And then on the way home Lue called me. “Kael! Hey. Did you, uh..turn Brian into a girl?”

“Yyyyes. But it was, well he wanted me to because after I explained all the stuff—”
“That's fine, that's fine. I was just trying to figure out why I remembered two different versions of...well, everything about her all of a sudden. Ju~st like the way I remember two versions of events in my own history.”

“Yeah, that's..usually what happens when I, uh, change someone. But it's usually just me and the person who got changed that remember the two versions...”

“Maybe it's because I knew Brian so well?”
“No, that can't be it. Ad—er, at least..two other people I've changed only remember the original versions of each other, and had to tell each other about having been changed at all. It—ohh.”
“What?”
“I told my power to change Brian exactly how he wanted to be, or tried to at least. Maybe he wanted you to remember both versions so you wouldn't be confused, or so he wouldn't be confused.”

“Why would that be confusing?”
“We promised each other I'd turn..her, back after a week. She's helping me find out if my power actually screws up people's minds or not. Hopefully.”

“It didn't screw up my mind. Well, not too much anyway, just enough for everything to feel natural, you know.”

“That's the thing, I—I can't be sure if when people are convinced their own minds haven't been changed that that isn't just part of what was changed, you know? So, something like an actual test is, should be good. For that.”

“If you say so. But if you find out it does mess up one's identity the way you're worried about, can you handle wrecking people's consciousnesses again to fix it?”
“Uh..what do you mean? I, I'd just put back whatever I broke, right?”
“But to the person I am now—for example—that'd be just breaking what was still in working order.”

It seems like it's always Lue making everything more complicated to figure out. Why? But I didn't say that, I just stopped, leaned back slightly and made a sound like “Uugh” into the receiever.

“...Well, at least I could make my power not break things whenever it acts again. I'd know what to tell it not to do, I mean. It's really better if it isn't doing what I'm worried about in the first place and I can just know for sure.”

“Of course it is, that'd be the easiest thing. But you really should decide what your moral imperative actually is in the hard case before you find out. So you don't go around harmfully altering folk's minds on a crazy impulse.”

“Yeah, again. If I basically have already.”

And I just can't wait to see what Adena's deal is tomorrow. I think the best I can hope for is it not making more problems for me to deal with.